My nose is so freakin' red right now I could host a children's television program. I've gone through one entire box of tissues and the second one is headed rapidly toward a quick and painless death. The weather was nice and I wanted to go for a run, but I can't be more than five feet from a tissue.
And to make matters worse, when I was in the backyard, I got stung by a bee. First time ever. I was catching some rays, a mere moment from falling asleep, when something penetrated the middle of my left hamstring. I wondered what it was, reached down and came up with a bee in my hand. Fucker. The stinging was like nothing I'd ever felt before. In some ways, I now understand the female side of sexual intercourse.
Friday, July 24, 2009
IF IT'S UPDATES YOU WANT...
...then it's updates you'll get. I'm fucking drunk. I sang karaoke for the first time in a long time and it was fun. First up was "What's My Name" by Snoop. Then "Gin and Juice." Then "Baby Got Back." Booyah!!!!!!!
Sometimes shit sucks. Then I get drunk and it doesn't suck anymore. I really dig this.
Sometimes shit sucks. Then I get drunk and it doesn't suck anymore. I really dig this.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
10:03 ON A TUESDAY NIGHT
I never thought anyone read this stupid blog, but I've had a few people inquire about my lack of updates lately, which leads me to believe that some of you actually care. For my loyal readers, here's a little news.
It's 10:03 p.m. on a Tuesday night. I'm wine drunk. Too much shit's in my head and I had to run from it. Story of my life. I can't deal so I bail. I'm making dinner so I can't type too much, but this is what's going on.
I've been hiding from all forms of writing, including this blog. I went a little crazy a few months ago and now I'm doing anything and everything that has nothing to do with words. I haven't written in my journal for a while, no blog posts, no money for writing, no nothing. In its place I've been running, hitting the gym and playing basketball. If only that could be my entire life.
Part of me wants to tell the entire story and the other part, the part that has dominated the majority of my life, is telling me to retreat, to keep my shit to myself. No one cares and I'm not all that comfortable revealing just how fucked up I am.
Maybe more later. Maybe not.
It's 10:03 p.m. on a Tuesday night. I'm wine drunk. Too much shit's in my head and I had to run from it. Story of my life. I can't deal so I bail. I'm making dinner so I can't type too much, but this is what's going on.
I've been hiding from all forms of writing, including this blog. I went a little crazy a few months ago and now I'm doing anything and everything that has nothing to do with words. I haven't written in my journal for a while, no blog posts, no money for writing, no nothing. In its place I've been running, hitting the gym and playing basketball. If only that could be my entire life.
Part of me wants to tell the entire story and the other part, the part that has dominated the majority of my life, is telling me to retreat, to keep my shit to myself. No one cares and I'm not all that comfortable revealing just how fucked up I am.
Maybe more later. Maybe not.
Monday, July 13, 2009
DRINKIN' WITH THE DISTRICT
Here are links to two stories from recent issues of the District. Yes, they are both about booze.
This first one is about the dollar beers at Fantasy Castle. My friends say it makes me sound gay. You decide.
This second one, which ironically mentions one of my gay friends, is about the white Sangria at Sevilla. It rules.
This first one is about the dollar beers at Fantasy Castle. My friends say it makes me sound gay. You decide.
This second one, which ironically mentions one of my gay friends, is about the white Sangria at Sevilla. It rules.
Monday, June 8, 2009
WTF???!!!!!!
No. 1: Yesterday I saw a grown man having an intense conversation with a suit of armor. I was driving down Broadway. There's this antique shop that has had this piece of junk sitting out front for God knows how long. So, I'm driving home when I see this guy, how do I say this nicely?? Um, I don't think this man has a permanent address. Anyway, even from a block away, I can tell he's really fired up about something. I get closer and I see he's yelling at the suit of armor. "Probably talking to someone through the door," I think. Nope. The door was closed. Shop was not open. Homeboy was yelling at the suit of armor.
No. 2. Just five minutes ago, a teacher walked into the building where I work at a community college.
"Uh, someone had an accident in the elevator?"
"What kind of accident?" the receptionist replied.
"Number two."
After further inspection (not by me), indeed, a shit was taken inside an elevator. The latest report says it's still fuming.
The teacher walked into my boss' office, a mere three feet from where I type. After hearing this, my boss responded with, "is it big?" The teacher said, and I quote, "no. But there's a lot of fiber."
No. 2. Just five minutes ago, a teacher walked into the building where I work at a community college.
"Uh, someone had an accident in the elevator?"
"What kind of accident?" the receptionist replied.
"Number two."
After further inspection (not by me), indeed, a shit was taken inside an elevator. The latest report says it's still fuming.
The teacher walked into my boss' office, a mere three feet from where I type. After hearing this, my boss responded with, "is it big?" The teacher said, and I quote, "no. But there's a lot of fiber."
Monday, May 25, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
DAY TRIP TO THE GARMENT DISTRICT
The girlfriend's a budding fashion designer and needed to hit LA's Garment District for some fabric. It was Saturday. The sun was up. I had shit to do, but nothing too pressing, so I said fuck it and hopped in the car. Plus, she promised we could hit what turned out to be an absolutely killer vegan restaurant named VegiSoul on the way home.
Here are some pics.
Random shot of some stores.
Intersection of 12th and San Pedro. Not quite a hotbed of activity. That's around the corner.
Part of the reason I wanted to take this trip was my love for old buildings. Downtown's got plenty of them. Here's one. I'd tell you what it is, but I don't know.
There is no great story behind this one except I was stopped at a red light and wanted to kill time. This is the result.
The final 100 yards before a swarm of people would make traffic nearly impossible.
A camera with a wider lens would show how there are garments on the sidewalk for as far as the eye can see. Of course, I wear glasses, so maybe that's just me. Anyway, there are lots. Here are some.
Pedestrians crossing on a green? What pedestrians crossing on a green?
Our destination was Michael Levine. There are two Michael Levine stores. This shot is of the one we didn't go to. Don't ask the difference; I'm just the boyfriend. If you're into fabric, it's like heaven. If you're not at all interested in that sort of thing, prepare to be more bored than you've ever been. Wait, I take that back. There are some Grade A women to people watch. Other than that, you'll be bored.
You wouldn't know it from this picture, but I had to wait a long ass time before I could snap one without a sea of people in it.
I tried to get a shot without a car, but that's like aiming your camera up and not getting a glimpse of the sky.
Maybe where the showrooms are is where families like this hang out, but not in the section we were in. I walked around and smelled piss and watched as people who didn't speak English sold hamsters on the sidewalk.
This is the back of the Michael Levine we went to. One hour validated parking!
Not sure why I took this one. Probably boredom. Or a desire to look like a tourist when I'm from a 20-minute drive from this location.
More cool buildings. Maybe in another life I'll live in downtown LA. There's just something about the area that has me intrigued.
Yet another cool old building.
A crowd of people usually means something interesting is going on. I took this pic, then crossed the street to see what was going down. It was nothing.
Santee Alley, home of knock-offs, pick pockets and parents who don't care that their children are walking into your shins.
This is just a guess, but after dark, I bet a lot of shady shit goes on in this alley.
Our photo tour concludes with a final picture of a cool old building.
Other than sitting in traffic for 20 minutes to get to a freeway offramp that without traffic was about three minutes away, I enjoyed myself. People from around the world think of LA as blondes, the beach, movie stars and all that. Sure, that's here, but when I think of LA, crowded downtown streets filled with people and cars and the smell of roadside taco stands is what comes to mind.
PS All that imitation crap and not one Lakers shirt. What gives?
Here are some pics.
Random shot of some stores.
Intersection of 12th and San Pedro. Not quite a hotbed of activity. That's around the corner.
Part of the reason I wanted to take this trip was my love for old buildings. Downtown's got plenty of them. Here's one. I'd tell you what it is, but I don't know.
There is no great story behind this one except I was stopped at a red light and wanted to kill time. This is the result.
The final 100 yards before a swarm of people would make traffic nearly impossible.
A camera with a wider lens would show how there are garments on the sidewalk for as far as the eye can see. Of course, I wear glasses, so maybe that's just me. Anyway, there are lots. Here are some.
Pedestrians crossing on a green? What pedestrians crossing on a green?
Our destination was Michael Levine. There are two Michael Levine stores. This shot is of the one we didn't go to. Don't ask the difference; I'm just the boyfriend. If you're into fabric, it's like heaven. If you're not at all interested in that sort of thing, prepare to be more bored than you've ever been. Wait, I take that back. There are some Grade A women to people watch. Other than that, you'll be bored.
You wouldn't know it from this picture, but I had to wait a long ass time before I could snap one without a sea of people in it.
I tried to get a shot without a car, but that's like aiming your camera up and not getting a glimpse of the sky.
Maybe where the showrooms are is where families like this hang out, but not in the section we were in. I walked around and smelled piss and watched as people who didn't speak English sold hamsters on the sidewalk.
This is the back of the Michael Levine we went to. One hour validated parking!
Not sure why I took this one. Probably boredom. Or a desire to look like a tourist when I'm from a 20-minute drive from this location.
More cool buildings. Maybe in another life I'll live in downtown LA. There's just something about the area that has me intrigued.
Yet another cool old building.
A crowd of people usually means something interesting is going on. I took this pic, then crossed the street to see what was going down. It was nothing.
Santee Alley, home of knock-offs, pick pockets and parents who don't care that their children are walking into your shins.
This is just a guess, but after dark, I bet a lot of shady shit goes on in this alley.
Our photo tour concludes with a final picture of a cool old building.
Other than sitting in traffic for 20 minutes to get to a freeway offramp that without traffic was about three minutes away, I enjoyed myself. People from around the world think of LA as blondes, the beach, movie stars and all that. Sure, that's here, but when I think of LA, crowded downtown streets filled with people and cars and the smell of roadside taco stands is what comes to mind.
PS All that imitation crap and not one Lakers shirt. What gives?
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